My Burnout Journey and How I Survived it
(This journal piece was kindly written by one of our parents who booked and attended two series of our Mindful Parent Hub workshops. We love hearing feedback from our workshops (good and bad) and this feedback was such a heartwarming and pleasant surprise to receive. Thank you to our parent for taking the time out to write this it becomes more than just workshops for us when we see the benefits)
After an uncharacteristic breakdown one weekend, I knew something was seriously wrong and that I needed to take action. I had googled my symptoms previously, which had thrown at me everything from depression, menopause, vitamin deficiencies, but none of them quite fit (and driven to get my blood tests done, the results came back fine).
This time, I saw the advert for the parental burnout workshops by Gemma and Sima, using life coaching and art therapy. I’d never heard of parental burnout before so looked up the term, and it finally seemed be an answer to what I’d been experiencing. Then I worried about the cost, how I would find the time to attend, what I would do for childcare. But I desperately needed the course of my life to change; to stop running on stress and anxiety, to stop feeling drained, to enjoy my children again, to feel hopeful about life once more. The cost was an investment to make that happen, and the rest – making time, finding childcare – I could figure out later. I firmly pushed away the worries and booked the entire series.
As it turned out, Gemma and Sima understood their audience; they gave the space and toys if you needed to bring your child along. And so, I embarked on the weekly sessions, sometimes with my 3-year-old playing Magnatiles besides me, and other times solo when I managed to get babysitting.
The workshops were a relief. Not only because of the topics that shed light on my struggles, and the art activities that soothed. But also due to having that weekly space to pause the hamster wheel that my life had become, to have the time to think my thoughts and express them out loud to other parents. We resonated with each other’s stories. My feelings were validated. I stopped feeling so alone.
Gemma and Sima were so kind, friendly, and shared their own life challenges, which created a safe, non-judgmental space that enabled everyone to be open and vulnerable.
As parents of young children, we are often racing against the clock and juggling so much, that we barely have time to breathe. Add to that, moving home to care for a sick elderly parent and, I see now, of course there was going to be burnout. But it is a frog-boiling-in-hot-water situation: your body adjusts and adjusts and adjusts to the accumulating stress level, that you don’t even realise you’re boiling until it’s too late and you’ve been burnt. You remember every school pickup, every medication to order, every appointment to attend, yet somehow you forget that you need to care for yourself too, and you also forget how to do so. And you forget how to feel joy.
The topics are nothing new that you can’t learn online, but it was having that guided time and space to think about them that was precious and key to me making conscious choices that changed my life’s trajectory. Sima’s art therapy activities helped me switch off from my daily life, silence my thoughts, and release my emotions. Gemma’s practical exercises helped me identify where and how I could make different decisions. I learned the importance of self-care in treating parental burnout, and what that self-care looks like for me personally. The session about priorities, using the glass and plastic balls analogy, helped me figure out how to make the time for my wellbeing. Yes, I have to feed my children, but no, I don’t have to spend hours slaving over a stove to do so, a conditioning from culture that I had to recognise and unlearn.
The improvements I saw in my mental state made me sign up for the second series. Repeating some of the exercises was so positive. Not only was I reminded of the valuable lessons, but I could compare my responses and see the transformation I had made. My art journal mapped the increase in my wellbeing.
I absolutely recommend Gemma and Sima’s workshops to any parents that feel like they are struggling. The Mindful Parents Hub gave me a safe space and the tools to move away from burnout, apathy, and anger to instead create hope, joy and possibilities.
Some of the artwork created in our workshops. Each activity was followed by CBT based questionnaire. Each activity is saved and these are used to track progress and to compare any repeat work undertaken at a later stage.
